


The Sea-Faring Reaper's Folly

by Sylph_of_Space



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Pirate, Barry Loves His Wife, Blood, Canon-Typical Violence, Davenport Is Tired Of His Children, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fire, Gods, Kravitz Is A Hopeless Gay, Lucretia Just Wants To Write In Peace, Lup Likes To Explode Things, M/M, Magic, Pirates, Siren!Taako, Sirens, So Is Taako, Swordfighting, Taako Is Too Pretty
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-20
Updated: 2018-07-20
Packaged: 2019-06-13 15:05:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,366
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15367254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sylph_of_Space/pseuds/Sylph_of_Space
Summary: Kravitz is a ship captain.There are these infamous pirates, however. People swear up and down they’re real, but they’ve never been captured, and are practically phantoms. Some people call them Ocean Witches, others claim them to be displeased spirits, some deny they’re even real, but they always leave a mark on any ship they take down. The same symbol, and no one can understand what it means.Their fabled ship is called the Starblaster, and it’s gorgeous.Kravitz's job is to take them down.The Reaper knows not what folly this is.[Pirate AU? Pirate AU.]





	1. The Bounty

**Author's Note:**

> Special thanks to my datemate for helping me come up with this idea and flesh it out. I love you more than anything. 
> 
> Anyways, enjoy!

A man stood on the deck of his ship, a coat and hat on, decorated to show his high ranking. He was not yet the captain of a fleet, but he was the captain of this ship in specific, the Raven’s Scythe. His dark dreads moved with the wind, his equally dark eyes scanning the water before him. His mind was preoccupied with the information he had learned about his latest target, from his Queen. He served under his Queen,sent out to protect her other ships, cargo, and the whatnot. He was to fight or hunt down pirates preying on her ships, given permission to take them dead or alive, and to plunder their ships, considering those were likely to be her stolen goods. 

There are these infamous pirates, however. People swear up and down they’re real, but they’ve never been captured, and are practically phantoms. Some people call them Ocean Witches, others claim them to be displeased spirits, some deny they’re even real, but they always leave a mark on any ship they take down. The same symbol, and no one can understand what it means.  
Their fabled ship is called the Starblaster, and it’s gorgeous. No one has ever seen the captain, but there are rumors that his stature is rather small in comparison to his great title. 

There are these twins, supposedly more beautiful than any beings, and people are convinced they aren’t humans, there’s no way. Some people say they’re sirens that got tired of waiting for prey, and wanted to go out and hunt them down. Others say they’re immortals with a taste for danger and excitement. 

With them was a man, once claimed to be a holy man that ran away from his “hag” of a wife for a life of adventure, oddly enough still preaching to those they met, offering them convergence before they were killed or left for dead. Supposedly his God bestowed powers unto him that really only benefit him on shore, but no one is sure whether this is true or not. 

Another man, one wearing indigo dyed fabrics which must have come from some far off land, who had fallen for one of the twins, but in an act of pure miracle for his sake, the twin had fallen in love with him as well, so he had become forever devoted to her, and was far more impressive a fighter than could be seen by looking at him. He also served as the navigator, and studied the stars above them to guide the way, science and logic dictating his ideas. 

With them was a woman, with skin dark, and hair white, some believed her to be some oracle from a far off land, especially with what knowledge she held. It is said she had an entire library of ship’s logs that she had written on the ship. Her memory was stronger than any man’s, and she was unafraid to fight for what she needed. 

The last fabled member of their crew was their greatest fighter, a man, brave, strong, and incredibly charming. Adorned with a bear skin, the man could fight off even 30 men on his own, at least, from reports of survivors that had their ships plundered. It was also noted that he was most likely to steal dogs that had belonged to the crew if they were aboard the other ship.

Seven people, seven simple people, rumored to be more powerful than a fleet. No one had been able to capture these seven people, which made this man’s task all the more interesting. If he was able to complete what no others could do, surely this would improve his ranking, earning him even more favor in his Queen’s service, and earning respect from sailors across the seas. A small smirk lifted his lips as he spotted a ship entering his view of the horizon. “‘Scuse me, Cap’n Kravitz.” One of the soldiers on his ship came up to him. “We’ve spott’d a ship out there.”

“I noticed. We’re going to board it. It could be the Starblaster.” He said simply, clasping his hands behind his back. “The biggest bounty of my career.” Through careful information gathering, he knew they used a cloaking device, and the ship would appear poorer than it was. He was taking no chances while out on the sea, even if that ship seemed like it would fall apart with a stiff wind. If it wasn’t the Starblaster, he would at least stop another ship of pirates. “Sail on.” He commanded, his hands moving to grip the railing, a deadly smirk growing on his face.


	2. A Loosing Battle

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Forgive me, fight scenes are not my strong suit.

“What will we do with a drunken sailor? What will we do with a drunken sailor? What will we do with a drunken sailor? Early in the morning.” A cheerful voice sang over the wind, which was picking up rather quickly. The waves were growing in size, becoming decent swells, and the sky was starting to darken. The man singing tightened the bandana holding his brown hair out of his eyes before yanking on a rope. With a storm brewing, he wanted to prepare the ship.

Another voice picked up where the first left off, a thick scottish accent shining through. “Way ‘ay up, she rises, way ‘ay up she rises, way ‘ay up she rises, e’rly in th’ mornin’!” The older mans thick, grey beard blew around with the wind. He huffed, taking a spare piece of fabric and ripping it to tie it down. There was a ship coming towards them, and he felt a fight coming on. 

“Shave his belly with a rusty razor.” A third voice picked up the song, grunting between lines as he secured different things on the deck. “Shave his belly with a rusty razor.” He finished tying down the loose items and moved to the captains quarters. “Shave his belly with a rusty razor, early in the morning.” He knocked on the door loudly. “Cap’nport, there’s another ship headin’ our way.” The burly man announced. A dark skinned woman walked by, humming the song the ship had been singing, writing in a notebook before snapping it shut and tucking it away. 

“Way hay up she rises.” Another voice finally picked up the nearly-forgotten song. This voice was beautiful. He stood by the bow, looking out at the rising waves and the ship coming closer. 

“Way hay up she rises.” A woman with an equally beautiful voice chimed in, standing next to him. They looked similar in appearance, nearly mirroring each other. 

“Way hay up she rises.” He smirked at her, his hand falling to his cutlass on his belt. 

“Early in the morning.” She finished, her hand falling to her belt as well, but grabbing small, black items. He had seen her use them enough times to know to keep his distance when she threw them. The ship fell silent of song, waiting for the ship that was coming for them. The last person on the ship finally emerged, short in stature but commanding respect from every person aboard. He had a serious look on his face as everyone became battle ready. It was rare they were attacked first, usually they did the boarding, but it hardly mattered. They would come out on top, they always did.

* * *

Kravitz waited until their ropes had been shot out to the other ship and wooden planks had been dropped down before ordering his sailors to cross and board the other ship. He waited just a few moments before crossing himself. He ordered no fatal violence yet. He always offered for there to be a surrender before resorting to a fight. With his men spread out across the ship, he stood where he could address the ship. There were only five people there, which he thought was rather odd. If this was the Starblaster, there would be seven. He was not stupid, however. He knew there were others hiding. His sharp eyes scanned the ship before he spoke. “My name is Kravitz, and I work for the Raven Queen. You are hereby ordered to surrender, by our Queen, and give up stolen goods. Your options are to surrender, or be killed. I have been told to take this ship, dead or alive.” His eyes wandered up the two center masts, curious where the others of the crew were. If he remembered correctly, by the descriptions of the Starblaster he had heard, the missing ones were.... The twins. 

“We’re not of the habit of surrendering.” The shortest of the crew snapped, his red mustache twitching with his words. A burly man wearing the skin of a bear draped over his shoulders nodded, his hand on his sword. 

“I’m not in the habit of letting pirates go.” Kravitz remarked. 

“Well, I suppose we’re at a bit of a stalemate, wouldn’t you say?” The same man smirked. In unison, the five of them in the center stomped their feet, then scattered into Kravitz’s sailors, weapons drawn. Kravitz saw movement out of the corner of his eye and looked up sharply. Two figures were there, one hanging off each mast. One threw something down, small black shells. Kravitz leaned forward to take a look and was knocked back when they exploded. 

He heard two pairs of feet hit the deck rather hard. He groaned, feeling very disoriented. They didn’t set things on fire but created a black smoke screen, and succeeded in knocking him back. The rocking of the ship did not help. The waves were reaching insane heights and the sky had opened up. It helped to get rid of the smoke screen, just in time for Kravitz to roll to the side to avoid a sharp sword. He pushed himself up, yanking his cutlass out of the sheath and smacking another sword out of his way. His view was taken up by the burly man in the bear skin, his well-kept bearded face drawn in a snarl, wrinkling a scar over his eye. He slashed down, now engaged in a sword fight on a rocking ship during a thunderstorm. Shouts of dying men filled his ears. While this crew certainly seemed to have its fair share of tricks, he also had some. He ducked, kicking the larger man with his boot rather hard. He reached down with his free hand for a dagger, coated in a deadly poison, and swung it around, grinning at the satisfying sound of it hitting flesh.

A scream filled his ears as he let go, seeing it was buried in an older mans arm. He clutched at it, eyes wide. “Pan, save me.” He muttered, yanking it out and nearly falling over. A dark skinned woman darted out of nowhere, dragging the older man off. Kravitz turned quickly, finding himself sword-to-sword with a beautiful man. 

“Well, aren’t you easy on the eyes?” He laughed, practically dancing around Kravitz. His sword moved fast, but Kravitz’s eyes were faster and he was able to dodge the deadlier slices. His opponent was able to gain a few small cuts on him. 

“You’ll be easier to finish off.” He sliced forward, cutting his arm. “Than I am on the eyes.” 

“I doubt that.” The man winked, climbing on the railing and using it to leap onto the flat side of Kravitz’s sword. It pushed his arm down, making him stumble as the acrobatic pirate leaped over him, his blonde-and-peach hair flowing behind him. Kravitz shook his head, whipping around as another assailant attacked him. She pressed her sword against his, a smirk wide on her lips. 

“You survived my brother, well done.” She laughed, flipping her sword up and then back down, slashing his arm rather badly. He winced, but could not afford to flinch. He had to keep going. His men were being cut down left and right. He did have to jump out of the way when a body was thrown in his direction, thrown by the burly man with a scar. A slender man slid up next to the woman he was crossing swords with. 

“You got this?” He panted, strands of brown peeking through a bandana. 

“Yes!” She shouted, kicking her foot up and planting it on Kravitz’s chest, shoving him backwards and into a mast. She threw down another one of her black shells, bringing up a thick cloud of smoke he had trouble seeing through. Before he knew it, he had a sword to his throat, his own sword knocked back. “Gotcha.” She smirked, grabbing rope from seemingly nowhere and making quick work of him, tying him to the mast. “Don’t go anywhere.” She jumped away, just as acrobatic as the boy from before. He snarled out, but once the smoke cleared, he could not believe his eyes. 

His men were either cut down or tied up. The fight had not lasted long, and yet seven people managed to take down all of his men, including himself. “What the fuck?” He growled out. He felt himself being untied, a sword at his neck again so he wouldn’t dare try any tricks. His hands were retied behind his back and he was marched, rather uncerimoniously, across the board bridging their ships. He was left on his own ship, with hardly a word. The plank was kicked off and the ropes severed before several cannonballs smashed into the sides. He fell over, struggling to right himself with no use of his hands. He stared across as the Starblaster sailed away, staring at the two infamous twins. The male was waving lazily, while the female smirked, raising her hand and throwing something as hard as she could. It was another black shell, but this time it did not hold smoke. It held fire. 

Kravitz felt a bit of panic seep into him. The storm they were fighting through was not enough to stop the flames. He managed to burn his ropes, but burned himself in the process. Seeing no option other than burning on the ship, he ran for the edge, cursing the Starblaster the entire way as he leaped over the edge, smacking into the ocean water hard enough to be dragged under by a wave.


End file.
